There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
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