At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
