He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
