I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
