stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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