Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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