So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
