I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
My hand turned me down
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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