everyone is single if you try hard enough
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
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