dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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