Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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