Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
