Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
