So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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