I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Randomize
