It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
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