I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize