You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I yelled at your uterus for you.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
