I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
