yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
