It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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