I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
