I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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