Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
