I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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