I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
