my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Randomize