the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
