And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
