Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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