This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Randomize
