As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
