I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
