C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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