i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
