he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Randomize
