his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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