her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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