He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
