return my video game
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
