Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
