If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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