Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize