if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Randomize
