if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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