Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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