Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
