wakey wakey hands off snakey
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
They took my balls.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
