Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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