How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
